[Royal Ram]

Hi, I just thought I would introduce myself as a new member. I pickup my 350 Classic on Tuesday and I'm so looking forward to it. it will be my first'geared' bike for 9 years after my accident. I use to ride litre sport bikes until my accident and last year I bought a Lambretta v 125 special which is an auto, but got me back on the road again. I first became acquainted with Royal Enfield when I took the scooter for it's first service as the garage is a dealership. After trying to mingle in with the local scooter club, it was obvious that you had to have an original scooter to be part of the group and it wasn't much fun. So when I saw the Classic up close I bought it there and then. I'm hoping to get out and about and meet like minded owners as I'm sure you aren't like the scooter club members. 

[AzCal Retred]

Welcome! You picked a good one to get back into it with. Just go ahead & post in the "J" model section, we're not proud.

[axman88]

Welcome to the forum!

I know what you mean about the Vintage Scooter folks.  I ride a 4 stroke Stella, which is right up there with a reintroduced Lambretta in being despised by the Vespa / Lambretta folks.

I love the idea of a vintage scooter, but I don't tolerate two strokes very well.  I was out just last night, participating in the annual Chicago "Slaughterhouse" scooter rally, and before the bikes even left the parking lot serving as the staging area for the night ride, I was nauseous from the fumes.  I tried to get to the front of the pack, but it wasn't much help, because, although the two strokes are anything but smooth when accelerating, once they hit their power band, they are fast!   Plus, somebody had apparently decided that the ride should be routed through the most congested heart of the Chicago friday night street scene and include as many stop lights as possible.  Being surrounded by just a few noisy, smelly vintage Vespas and Lambrettas, gleefully rev bombing their engines and honking their horns while pumping out clouds of sickly smelling gray smoke, was enough to fill my head with thoughts of just where a ball peen hammer should be applied to most quickly and permanently disable those "classics".  I bugged out, with another suffering 4 stroke rider, about 2/3 of the way through the ride.  My stomach is still upset 14 hours later.   When I buy a classic vintage scooter, it will likely be a Cushman.

I'd vent in more suitable internet venues, but I suspect that the vintage 2 stroke riders are the core members.

[AzCal Retred]

Next year advocate at your club for a "sustainable green future" and suggest they (the two strokers) all use castor bean oil. At least it smells good...

[GlennF]

Do be aware breathing in all that excess caster oil emitted by your bike may have an undesired side effect on your bowel movements.

[AzCal Retred]

No problem, just run "regular"...

https://www.mq.edu.au/__data/assets/pdf_file/0004/1215346/Plant-of-the-week-Ricinus-communis-Castor-Oil-Plant.pdf
Unfortunately for the pilots, their goggles become misted with castor oil and scarves were essential to wipe goggles clean, hence the choice of white. Another unfortunate effect of the castor oil unavoidably swallowed by pilots was its purgative effect, resulting in pilots suffering from constant bouts of diarrhoea.

From Duncan Bell-Irving's biography 'Gentleman Air Ace':
"The only effective lubricant for the rotary engine was castor oil. As the huge mass of engine whirled around, spewing out a spray of castor oil, pilots and ground crew complained not only of the smell but of the fact that it affected their digestive systems."

[axman88]

Next year advocate at your club for a "sustainable green future" and suggest they (the two strokers) all use castor bean oil. At least it smells good...

I think at least one guy WAS running castor.  It had a sweetish smell, like muffins.  Still made me nauseous and gave other people headaches.  I'm not actually a member of the Vespa club that sponsored the ride, they see my Stella as a cheap knock-off, and unworthy, but I think I will nevertheless suggest that they do something to manage the two strokes.   Might be a struggle though, the president of the club owns 3 Vespas, the youngest being a '72.

I know some clubs relegate the oil burners to the BACK of the column.  They could also give them their very OWN group, that strong stomached 4 stroke riders could join if they want a taste of the full vintage experience.

I love the vintage bikes aesthetically, but they don't seem to belong in a tight packed, stoplight to stoplight, tour of a very congested social street scene.  The sponsors could have chosen a free flowing route, but instead routed us down a restricted access, two lane road adjacent to a huge music venue, where a sold out teen show had just wrapped up.  Like trying to motor past the grade school when the parent's SUV's are lining up, ... madness!

After than, a slow crawl past the nightclub scene, pretty girls in club dresses, middle age crisis guys in fancy suits smoking cigars on the sidewalk. double parked custom SUVs with lo-profile rims, the whole pretentious mess.  When you see people rolling up their windows, I see that as a sign.  But the vintage guys seem so full of self worth, as to be totally oblivious.   This ride seemed to be more about rubbing people's faces in their glorious uniqueness than anything about actually riding.  We spent more time standing still than riding.

You know when a bachelor like me misses out on the free meals the paid admission to the 3 day rally entitled them to, that something is very wrong.  Nothing like having a sick stomach for a couple days to get a guy belly-aching. 

[AzCal Retred]

Maybe show up with one of these on as a hardass...

I like the idea of staggered start times. Easy to do and saves on the "noise" for the promoters. Couldn't hurt to run it by them. But you, like me, probably don't need a free meal very badly anyway. Maybe there's another club run that you could attend? How about alternate routes for different groups? Call it the "Apartheid Run"? 

[axman88]

Maybe show up with one of these on as a hardass...

I like the idea of staggered start times. Easy to do and saves on the "noise" for the promoters. Couldn't hurt to run it by them. But you, like me, probably don't need a free meal very badly anyway. Maybe there's another club run that you could attend? How about alternate routes for different groups? Call it the "Apartheid Run"? 

I communicated with another 4 stroke rider today, and he had the same reaction.  Apparently quite a few people noticed and were discussing the lack of breathable air.  Hopefully a few emails expressing our regrets in being unable to support them in the future, will get the club in the mindset to try to manage the issue in the future. 

There were other rides planned, including a staggered start "Time Trial", to achieve the "most average time", and rides to the sponsors locations and other locations that were probably less problematic.  http://www.slaughterhousechicago.com/XXIX/   

I think the whole mishegas could have been avoided by not trying to route through the most congested party-central north side area, on friday, date night.

In previous years, the club used "blockers" to aggressively block intersections so the entire column could maintain unity.  2 stroke fumes were noticeable, but not overwhelming, because we kept moving.   But Chicago, like a lot of cities, has been experiencing issues this summer with large squads of "hooligan squid riders", and I hear the club wanted to avoid association with those ne'er do wells, and potential road rage incidents, so there was a LOT of stopping for lights, then stopping to wait for the 2/3 of the group that missed the light, and have to hang around for the 1/3 behind those that missed the next light after that.  I was at the front of the "fast" 2nd group, and I can attest that it wasn't the crop dusters slowing things down.  Those boys wanted to GO, and I wanted desperately to get ahead of them.

I like the gas mask idea.  Just wearing one on a strap, around the collection point and occasionally announcing "I wanted to be ready in case some of the two strokes don't break down", should make me a popular guy.

[GlennF]

Maybe show up with one of these on as a hardass...

I like the idea of staggered start times. Easy to do and saves on the "noise" for the promoters. Couldn't hurt to run it by them. But you, like me, probably don't need a free meal very badly anyway. Maybe there's another club run that you could attend? How about alternate routes for different groups? Call it the "Apartheid Run"? 

You could go for a modern look with some tactical gear and a CM6.  Protect you from shrapnel as well if any of those two strokes implode.

[axman88]

You could go for a modern look with some tactical gear and a CM6.  Protect you from shrapnel as well if any of those two strokes implode.

Or maybe a hazmat suit?  My clothes stank after the ride.

Because of prior years experience, with the group running red lights, some of which were equipped with automatic ticket issuing cameras, I brought along blue painter's tape for my license plate.  If one gets stopped by an actual human cop, blue tape comes off quick and easy if you make a little fold-over at one end to grab.  I offered some to one of the 2 stroke guys, but it wouldn't stick to his plate.  I guess the oil residue does have some benefit as an anti-rust treatment.

[Leofric]

You could go for a modern look with some tactical gear and a CM6.  Protect you from shrapnel as well if any of those two strokes implode.

Or maybe a simple face mask like the ppe we have for Covid !

[axman88]

Or maybe a simple face mask like the ppe we have for Covid !

Not a bad idea, but how will I get the 2 stroke guys to put the masks over their tailpipes, and won't they melt and burn?