[Richard230]

An excellent description, Otto.   

[Richard230]

A teacher in a Detroit kindergarten class asked the kids what kind of sound a pig makes. Little Tyrone stood up and yelled: "FREEZE, MUTHAFUCKA!”

[malky]

A teacher in a Detroit kindergarten class asked the kids what kind of sound a pig makes. Little Tyrone stood up and yelled: "FREEZE, MUTHAFUCKA!”

Is that the same Tyrone, that when asked to make a farm yard impression yelled: "GET OFF MY TRACTOR YOU BA$#ARD".

[Richard230]

Looters.   

[Richard230]

A Texas Woodpecker and a North Carolina Woodpecker were arguing about which state had the toughest trees. The Texas Woodpecker said that they had a tree that no woodpecker could peck. The North Carolina Woodpecker challenged him and promptly pecked a hole in the tree with no problem. The Texas Woodpecker was in awe. The North Carolina Woodpecker then challenged the Texas Woodpecker to peck a tree in North Carolina that was absolutely un-peckable. The Texas Woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge. After flying to North Carolina, the Texas Woodpecker successfully pecked the tree with no problem. The two woodpeckers were now confused. How could it be that the North Carolina Woodpecker was able to peck the Texas tree and the Texas Woodpecker was able to peck the North Carolina tree, when neither one was able to peck the tree in their own state? After much woodpecker pondering, they both came to the same conclusion: Your pecker is always harder when you're away from home. 

[Otto_Ing]

A Texas Woodpecker and a North Carolina Woodpecker were arguing about which state had the toughest trees. The Texas Woodpecker said that they had a tree that no woodpecker could peck. The North Carolina Woodpecker challenged him and promptly pecked a hole in the tree with no problem. The Texas Woodpecker was in awe. The North Carolina Woodpecker then challenged the Texas Woodpecker to peck a tree in North Carolina that was absolutely un-peckable. The Texas Woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge. After flying to North Carolina, the Texas Woodpecker successfully pecked the tree with no problem. The two woodpeckers were now confused. How could it be that the North Carolina Woodpecker was able to peck the Texas tree and the Texas Woodpecker was able to peck the North Carolina tree, when neither one was able to peck the tree in their own state? After much woodpecker pondering, they both came to the same conclusion: Your pecker is always harder when you're away from home. 

HA-HA: Very true. I know lot of woodpeckers, I was really impressed with their pecking capabilities. That was untill I met them in their own habbitat. 

[malky]

 

[The Old Coot]

  

[Richard230]

Not a bad definition of HP and torque. It does kind of get the idea across.   

[Richard230]

Ouch!  That had to hurt.   

[Arizoni]

Shortly after the creation of man, the various body parts got to talking.

The brain, being somewhat self centered said to the other parts, "I am in charge around here.  I do all the thinking so I alone should do all of the controlling."

The stomach said, "I disagree.   I process all of the food and supply you and all the other body parts with the energy and minerals you all need to function.  Therefore, I should be in charge."

While a rousing debate between the brain and the stomach raged, suddenly, the anal orifice said, "Quite!  Your both wrong.  I am the one around here that is in charge around here."

The brain and stomach both looked at the anal orifice and said in unison, "YOU???  Your nothing but a small, insignificant orifice.  You can't be in charge around here."

The anal orifice said, "We'll see about that." and it immediately stopped doing its job.

Within a day, the brain couldn't think about doing anything but taking a crap and the stomach lost all of its appetite for food or drink.

After three days, both the brain and stomach had enough and they said to the anal orifice,
"OK.  OK.  YOU WIN.  You can be in charge around here."

And ever since that day, bosses around the world have been ass holes.

(I've known many bosses that weren't, but the majority of the bosses I've known qualify, totally.)

[Richard230]

I don't know how they do it.     But I guess if you live in a third-world country and can't afford a car or truck, you make do with what you have. 

[Richard230]

"Sparky" goes to heaven.   

[The Old Coot]

 

[Richard230]

My childhood goals.