Just a couple more cents...
First off, I got nothin' against nobody... but the "who prefers to do what with whom" question DOES make it harder to do things... I can comment a little on the problems with how to make this work - at least aboard ship. For those who ain't been there, its tough to describe how cramped living conditions are at sea...
Used to be that gals weren't allowed to serve in our ships. One reason was that, at the time, females could not serve in "combat" jobs. That restriction has since been lifted. Second reason was, our ships were never designed to accommodate both sexes, and its hard to make changes to do it, particularly on smaller ships (I heard recently we will be putting females on our submarines). Then you have the major question of how to keep guys and gals from doing what guys and gals do... you can provide separate berthing and regulations against it, but it's tough to fight biology, and good 'ol biology can interfere with damn near everything (I recall with fondness...).
Speaking to folks I served with who are in positions of Command today, all of the above are "issues". Most will say that things were certainly easier, less expensive, and very likely more efficient under the "old" way. Our Navy has changed, but it isn't entirely for the better.
The same folks say that trying to make "guys and gays" work together in the confines of shipboard life will add one more layer to the difficulties. Would a Commander berth two people together when one may have a sexual preference towards their roomate? Does it make sense to berth gay men or lesbians together (biology again). Do you put gay men with lesbian women? Gets complicated...
I served with men and women who were gay - they told me. They were good friends and good sailors. They knew what the regs were and knew they could not practice their sexual preference and still serve. Damn grateful I never had to make that sacrifice.
No matter how you slice it, it makes things harder.
Mike and Stumpy in Michigan