Author Topic: Halloween Humor  (Read 1421 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Arizoni

  • Grand Gearhead
  • *****
  • Posts: 7,412
  • Karma: 2
  • "But it's a dry heat here in Arizona
on: October 31, 2012, 04:04:07 pm
Halloween is coming!



A man is walking home alone late one foggy night...

when behind him he hears:


Bump...



BUMP...



BUMP...




Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.



BUMP...




BUMP...




BUMP...





Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him




FASTER...




FASTER...





BUMP...






BUMP...



BUMP...



He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.







However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping








clappity-BUMP...



clappity-BUMP...




clappity-BUMP...



on his heels, the terrified man runs.





Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.


With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.






Bumping and clapping toward him.



The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!








Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...













and,




(hopefully you're ready for this!!!)



The coffin stops!!!!
 
 

 
Jim
2011 G5 Deluxe
1999 Miata 10th Anniversary


Jack Leis

  • Grand Gearhead
  • *****
  • Posts: 634
  • Karma: 0
  • 2011 G5 Classic, F&%king Stolen
Reply #1 on: October 31, 2012, 04:43:27 pm
It's nice to hear a clean joke ! Good job Jim !
I would much rather ride a slow bike fast than a fast bike slow    Jack


jartist

  • Grand Gearhead
  • *****
  • Posts: 761
  • Karma: 0
Reply #2 on: October 31, 2012, 05:28:37 pm
Nice!


LarsBloodbeard

  • Grease Monkey
  • ****
  • Posts: 303
  • Karma: 0
Reply #3 on: October 31, 2012, 08:16:55 pm
Nice one!  Here's another Halloween story, perhaps a little spookier.  :)


A group of trick-or-treaters pass by a cemetery and start daring each other to go in.  Well, none of them wanting to back down from a challenge, they all decide to go in. 

Just to show how brave they are they walk deep into the cemetery, passing grave after grave.

"See?  No big deal, " one of them says, pretending not to be scared.  When suddenly a sharp rap breaks the still air. 

[chink], [chink], [chink]

They freeze with fear as they notice the sound is rather close by.

[chink], [chink], [chink]

They turn towards the rapping to see a figure leaning over a tombstone with a chisel and hammer.

"Oh!  Whew, you had us scared for a moment there mister.  What are you doing working so late?"

The shriveled old man turned his cataract-fogged eyes toward them and said, in a dusty old voice:  "They misspelled my name."


john hut

  • John Hut
  • Scooter
  • **
  • Posts: 91
  • Karma: 0
  • EFI Bulleteer
Reply #4 on: October 31, 2012, 09:55:56 pm
Halloween is coming!




A man is walking home alone late one foggy night...

when behind him he hears:


Bump...



BUMP...



BUMP...




Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.



BUMP...




BUMP...




BUMP...





Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him




FASTER...




FASTER...





BUMP...






BUMP...



BUMP...



He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.







However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping








clappity-BUMP...



clappity-BUMP...




clappity-BUMP...



on his heels, the terrified man runs.





Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.


With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.






Bumping and clapping toward him.



The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!








Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...













and,




(hopefully you're ready for this!!!)



The coffin stops!!!!
John Electra Deluxe Efi


john hut

  • John Hut
  • Scooter
  • **
  • Posts: 91
  • Karma: 0
  • EFI Bulleteer
Reply #5 on: October 31, 2012, 10:03:20 pm
Sorry Arizona,tried to comment but it came out all wrong and I could not delete, dont mean to spoil your top joke ?
John Electra Deluxe Efi


Arizoni

  • Grand Gearhead
  • *****
  • Posts: 7,412
  • Karma: 2
  • "But it's a dry heat here in Arizona
Reply #6 on: November 01, 2012, 04:02:35 am
No problem!

Hope you had a happy Halloween! :)
Jim
2011 G5 Deluxe
1999 Miata 10th Anniversary


jartist

  • Grand Gearhead
  • *****
  • Posts: 761
  • Karma: 0
Reply #7 on: November 01, 2012, 03:56:16 pm
Thanks for the joke! It was a hit at the water cooler yesterday!